There is nothing more lonely than being in an unhappy or unhealthy relationship. That cold feeling of aloneness that fills your soul cannot be compared to anything else. When you are in a relationship that has lost its connection, or “you have lost that loving feeling” the void is immense. It echoes silently between both, reminding you of the days when you could talk about everything and laugh easily.
You wonder how you got to this point, where you no longer visit easily and that attraction you once felt has disappeared and been replaced with the ability to easily find flaws in each other. You once spent nights cuddling and sharing your dreams and secrets and now you barely talk.
Should you try and resurrect this now dead relationship or simply move on and try to start over again. It is as if you are in a no win situation, because you are unable to get what you need from the one you’re with and you are not supposed to get it from anyone else. What can a person do in this situation?
I will touch on a couple of ideas that may help:
Try and remember what made you fall in love with each other in the first place. When we first met each other we gave each other undivided attention and made them feel important. We are interested in what they say and how they feel and the ideas that they have and share.
When we have spent time together we start to tune each other out and take each other for granted. The respect and interest you give a new date or friend is not the same. To rekindle that connection start giving your love interest more attention and see if they will return it.
Treat your relationship like you are dating. Take care of yourself and your appearance when you are around them. Make plans to do something different from you have, brake out of your routine. Spice up your sex life and try something new and exciting that gets your hormones stimulated. Make sure you are holding hands and kissing, it is a great kick-start to stimulation and connection.
If you find you can’t communicate with each other than it is important to seek help and find out how to open up the lines of communication. The best way to any healthy relationship is through open communication so couples are not harboring any confusion or resentment.
Start a date night and do not let anything interrupt that night, it should be devoted to just the two of you. You can start a new hobby together that would be new and fun that would add something to talk about as well as a new focus and common interest.
If you have tried all of these things and nothing works and the other person is not willing to work on it, then it could be for your best interest to move on and start over. I assure you there are other people out there that can fulfill you if your partner is not interested in trying to make your relationship work!
You deserve to be happy and you are in charge of your future.
If you would like help working through your relationship issues contact me at Lovinglife.us
Deni Abbie Life & Relationship Coach